7 June 2019

If you haven’t read my Eid and new baby delivery adventures, you can read all about them on my main blog. For our fourth and possibly final baby, we have chosen the nearest private hospital to our new home in Semenyih which is KPJ Kajang in well, Kajang. Adam & Mia was born in Hospital Putrajaya, Hana in Pantai Hospital Cheras and new baby boy in Kajang. That’s 3 different states for 4 different children. It is also coincidental that we have four different addresses for each of our children. It seems like whenever we move places, we will have a new baby at that new address. And since this Serene Heights home will likely be our final resting place, no more children after this or else we’ll have to move in to a new place first.

But I digress. We didn’t expect Linda’s delivery at KPJ Kajang to encounter any difficulties, particularly in term of insurance coverage. This is because when Hana was born 8 years ago, all our hospital bills were fully covered by Linda’s employer. We thought it would be just the same this time around. So you can imagine our surprise when we were presented with the final hospital bill of RM2037.70 at around the time of discharge. We called the insurance panel and they confirmed the excess fees. It took us a while to take out all our savings and then borrow some more from our relatives to settle the bill.

One week later, we found out that there was a new collective agreement signed between Linda’s employer and the executive staff union. Apparently in this new agreement, all hospital delivery charges are capped to just RM1,500 and we had to pay for the operation theatre charges ourselves hence the ridiculously high final bill.

In spite of all that, on the bright side, we’re grateful that everything went smoothly during the delivery and Linda and the baby were all safe and sound. The hospital nurse and staff were very professional and caring throughout our stay there. If not for the bill, it would have been a very pleasant stay. I would highly recommend KPJ Kajang and Dr Rasliza, provided you can afford them.

12 May 2019

After moving to Semenyih from Seri Kembangan, my wife has been ferrying our 2 children back and forth to their old school in Taman Desaminum for the last 7 months. It was tiring for sure but we had little choice since circumstances like lack of suitable school, no transport and limited choice of nurseries to send them to. Last month however, the stars aligned and we stumbled upon another school within the vicinity of the Bangi area and this one is just 8 kilometers from our place. How we did not know about this school before is still a mystery to me, but found it we did through word of mouth and we set in motion the process to transfer both our kids to this new school, much closer to home. You can read all about the procedures here.

When we broke the news that they are transferring to a new school, Mia and Hana were less than enthusiastic about the prospect of leaving all their friends behind. Mia for example has been going there for the past 5 years and have numerous bffs as they like to call it. Hana meanwhile is already a prefect even though she is just in year 2. So you would understand the hesitance about the whole thing. When we first drove right in front of the school, they were still not convinced, even more so when we brought them to the school office and sightseeing inside the school. The new school is a bit older than the one in Taman Desaminium, almost everything is less flashier and the facilities are not as good.

But like it or not, we don’t really have a choice but to move them here because for one thing, their mother is about to deliver the new big brother next month and once I tool over sending them to school, I don’t think I could make it in time, dropping them off before 7:20 and also arriving at work before 8:00AM. Even if I do manage it, it will be very frantic and I don’t fancy driving like a mad man every day as to not arrive late. Apart from that, I can list down about half a dozen other reasons why the new school is so much better in term of economy and travel time for all of us. We can save some money on transportation, they can come home much-much earlier every day - before 6:30PM instead of an hour later and most importantly their mother especially don’t have to drive so far away every day to send and pick them up from school.

I know it will take some time for them to adjust to the new school, new friends, new teachers and new environment. They will not immediately make new bffs or like their new teachers but I’m sure it won’t be long before they do. Mia for example had voiced how she misses all her friends at the old school and does not like the new school as much as the old one. Hana on the other hand is still adjusting with life not as a prefect. 2 months from now, I hope they don’t even remember much about life in their old school. It will be a little bit difficult at first children, but I know you guys will adjust nicely in time.

12 April 2019

Last weekend we had some sort of family reunion/family day at some homestay in Janda Baik. This would be the first proper family gathering since I left the family Whatsapp group. Spill the tea you say? Well let’s just say I don’t agree with some of the political posting in the group and it got into some heated exchange and in the end I excused myself voluntarily from the group. As you might know, I have a pretty strong political view and belief. Suffice to say, I will not stay quiet when somebody post a preposterous political message, usually copied from the next group there on the family Whatsapp group. I can respect the fact that the entire family supports the opposition party, I just cannot accept straight up lies or propaganda pieces flashed before my eyes. I cannot help myself but comment and they are not always complimentary. Unsurprisingly, my wife was uneasy seeing me having heated arguments with my in laws including her father in the group. If I can’t response to those political message, why bother be in the group at all? So that pretty much what happened. My life has been a sea of tranquility ever since.

I know it will be a somewhat awkward gathering. I am never the talkative or friendly type to begin with. But for the sake of our family and my wife, I try to keep it cordial and amiable. Besides, fighting with your family for the sake of politics is pretty stupid. We can have our differences and be civil with each other. Politics is important but family is importanter because you are basically stuck with the latter for the rest of your lives. Anyway the family day went on quite well with the usual fanfare. We had the usual fun and games for the kids and adults. Matching shirts, exchanging of gifts and the customary barbecue.

Janda Baik is only about an hour and half drive from KL so it was strategically located with a little stream running along the homestay. I don’t fancy bathing in it much because the water’s not too deep. But the kids are absolutely loving it. Our rented room was pretty small to cram all five of us. But since someone else is paying, I can’t really complain much. All in all, it’s been a pretty decent get together. Sure you can sense a tinge of tension and awkwardness in the air. I’ve never been the model son in law that they could ask for. That said, I tried my best to keep it amicable. I know my wife is always keen to get together with her siblings and especially her parent so it’s the least I could do.

27 February 2019

This is Mia, 9 years old. She’s been a regular hockey player for her school since the past 2 years. In fact she’s been with the school team since it was created at about the same time then. We supported all the way of course. Send her off and pick her up from training and tournaments. Bought her expensive hockey equipments. I remember the times we had to schedule our weekends around her hockey training sessions. Sometimes in the morning, other times at night at the Tun Razak hockey stadium in downtown KL.

She had good progress with the hockey team. At first they were the underdogs, barely manage to scrap a win if not defeated easily in competitions. Then as time goes by and after some consistent training and a lot of hard work, the team improved admirably. They were doing pretty well in several tournaments, usually making the semi finals if not the finals itself. In this picture here, you can see Mia and her family posing for a picture after losing out in the finals of the state championships. Mia was not as fair as her little sister to begin with but after 2 years of hockey, she gets a lot darker due to the harsh training conditions under the hot sun. It’s the sacrifice she had to make.

After the last state championships though, Mia decided to call it quits all of a sudden. We were not sure if it was because she was not selected to represent the state at the national level. If we ask her, she just said she’s tired of playing hockey. Two years of training and playing and she just feels tired now? Whatever it is we respect and supported her decision. It’s no use forcing your children to do something she does not enjoy anymore. Perhaps she is genuinely tired of hockey or she just wants to take a break from it all. It’s been a good but long journey and some experience to us all. Goodbye early morning and late night hockey trainings, I won’t miss it at all.

22 January 2019

A letter for my son.

Dear son,

I don’t know if you have known about this but I never finished my college degree in UPM many-many years ago. It is still to this day one of the biggest regret of my life. If I could turn back time and do it all over again, I would do everything in my power to finish that final 2 semesters in UPM. You know what’s worse than not finishing your degree? Apart from the shame that it brought towards my family and friends, I had to go headlong into the working world with nothing but my SPM certificates. How do I compete in a world where some diploma, degree and even master graduates are still trying to find jobs? I don’t. I end up doing dead end jobs like working in a 7-Eleven and getting minimum wages as a cashier at IKEA. It was demoralizing for sure but that’s what I had to do to put some food on the table for us and to pay the bills.

Let me tell you I was once young like you, full of teenage hormones and struck by this thing call relationship or love. I know the first one was really special and almost nothing else would matter to you. When your mother and I was a couple, I started to drift away from my studies in college. I know I have no one to blame but myself but having a serious relationship at that tender young age is a huge distraction from my studies. And while your mother successfully finished her degree and got a decent job at the same company she is now, I never did and I had to start from the bottom. Had I finished my degree then, I would have certainly got a better job, a better career prospect. We could have been a lot better off than we are right now. I could bring everybody to Disneyland once in a while instead of Legoland once in 5 years. We could have driven around in a larger car, bought a bigger house and we also could have had air conditioners in everybody’s room. Instead I had to go to hell and back before I gained enough experience to secure a job as a lowly computer technician in Seri Kembangan when you was about 2 years old. We were living with my mom for almost a year after we got married and we didn’t get to buy our first car until 2 years later. I don’t know if you remember this but we used to ride on my motorbike all 3 of us to Tesco and back for our monthly groceries shopping. We were that poor. And it was all mostly because I didn’t finish my degree.

My point here is, there’s nothing wrong to feel loved and to have a casual relationship with a member of the opposite sex. As long as you don’t let it jeopardize or affect your studies in any way. I can’t stress you enough how important it is to do well in your PT3 and later SPM because these two are your first stepping stones to a college degree. And once you got yourself into a university, there will be more challenges and temptations to lead you astray from your goals. Trust me I know because I’ve been through it all. So I worry if you are already distracted right now, how would you handle all those upcoming challenges in your life?

When I was your age, sure I’ve had a few crush but they were just that, silent admiration from afar. Coming from a rural boarding school in Machang, having girlfriends or couples were almost unheard of. But once I’ve signed up for university, the world opened up for me and everything changes. Suddenly I was not afraid to start a conversation with girls or even get their numbers. It is somewhat a huge culture shock for me. So it is little wonder how I end up putting aside my studies in exchange for those quick pleasures and gratifications. I just didn't think or care far enough about my life or future back then.

Son I know you might think you have found the one and you will want this relationship to be forever. Well you could make that happen. I know a lot of my former schoolmates end up with their old schoolmates in marriage although they never dated or had any relationship whatsoever back then. As for me, I’ve had an off and on relationship with at least 3 girls before I met your mother. If it’s meant to be, you will end up together eventually. If it’s not, no matter how you both feel or what you do or promise right now will guarantee that. What you can and must do now is concentrate on your studies, do well in your exams. Everything else is secondary. Please-please do not make the same mistakes that I did. Nothing is more important in your life right now that education. How you do right now will affect your future 5 to 10 years down the road. There's only so much we as a parent can do to help and guide you to the right path. The rest it's up entirely to you.