28 December 2013


We just got back from our hometown to pick up the kids. They've spent the last 40 days or so back home with their grandparent. Since my wife and I had to work and hardly have enough time or money to take them to some exotic holiday, it's either the nursery or their grandparent every school holiday. I know it sucks, but that's city life for you.

When I was small, my Dad used to send us packing to Penang as well to live with my grandma during the long school holiday. I enjoyed it at first but after a few weeks, I got really tired and bored of living there that I wished my Dad did't send me there in the first place. Perhaps it's because my grandma didn't take us anywhere much you know, sightseeing or anything. Sure they will bring us to Penang Fest at the end of our stay but that's like one day from the entire stay. Today I'm doing exactly that. Send my kids home, stay for a day or two and come back a month later. Now I know how it feels and why my Dad had to do what he did.

While my grandparent would be thrilled to have their grandchildren stay for long period of time, I can't say the same for our children. There's only so much video game or TV show they can watch every day. By the third or fourth week, my eldest will be calling us frequently asking when we would come to pick them up. It's heartbreaking by what else could we do? In my time, I was lucky cause my Mom's a teacher and she would come home eventually in the afternoon. Besides, it was my grandma who looked after all of us most of the time anyway when she's not around.

Talking about going home, it's funny that I seemed to spent of my time there at my in law's place. When I was little, I used to wonder/complain why my uncles seemed to spend more time at their wives home more than my grandma's place. Now I understand. First of all, our kampong house is not that big and since my uncles seemed to have new family member almost every year, it certainly can't fit all of them every hari raya. Second, somehow, our kids seemed to have better bond with their maternal grandparent compared to their paternal ones. My kids for example are more comfortable staying with my wife's parent than my own. Perhaps that's why. While I would like to spend more time at my own hometown than anywhere else, after 9 years of marriage I started to accept the fact that my in law's place is also my home. Besides, my Mom is not always home anyway cause she frequently go back and forth between KL and Pasir Mas almost every other month.

There are some things that you wonder and ponder why when you were small and only learn the answer when you grow up, married and have kids. Keep this in mind children if you ever wonder why we did the things we do.

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